Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
