Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
