thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
