Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
