Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
