it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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