Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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