i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
