i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
