i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
