in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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