they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
