I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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