Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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