Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
