Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize