Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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