My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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