There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
