Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize