these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
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Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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