it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
