Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Randomize
