I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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