Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
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He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
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When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I have so many feelings about this burrito
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