Its about making memories worth repressing
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
