the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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