i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
