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• (415): View more from California

  its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  had another sex dream about alec baldwin...

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Well for starters, her tits were hairy.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.

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• (562): View more from California

  Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?

  (916): View more from California

  My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.

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• (714): View more from California

  Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)

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