Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.