Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today