I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?