$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize