The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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