it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
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I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
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Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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