Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(815): View more from Illinois

His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

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(310): View more from California

but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?

(973): View more from New Jersey

it happened again.

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(513): View more from Ohio

I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(281): View more from Texas

Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."

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(847): View more from Illinois

And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.

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(760): View more from California

I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.

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(425): View more from Washington

At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.

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