you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
