The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Farmville is her only friend.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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