also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
