I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
