they need to just BURY HIM!
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
