I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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