I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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