I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
