can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Randomize
