hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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