Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize