I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
True college students do jello shots in the library
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