Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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