white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
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We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
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Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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