i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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