I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
