it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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