Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
So vagazzling was a success
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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